What to do as a partner

The most important thing that you as partner can do is remain positive. It is very nice for your wife to hear that everything progressing as it should and that she is doing really well. If you remain positive, your wife will do so too and that it really important during a delivery!

It can be difficult for you to see that your wife is suffering. But do try not to commiserate with her by saying things like: Óh how terrible for you!’ and ‘dear oh dear, you do have a lot of pain!’ But tell her how well she is working at it and that you are proud of her. That will give your wife more strength and energy.


  • Remind your wife to have a drink now and then. Women often forget this during the contractions.
  • Advise your wife to go to the toilet every 2 hours or so. A full bladder can prolong the birth unnecessarily.
  • Try out various positions to lighten the contractions.
  • Massage your wife’s lower back, just above her tail bone. During a contraction it can feel good if someone puts pressure on there or massages it.
  • Keep count of how often the contractions come during the active phase so that you know when you should call us.
    Don’t discuss anything with your wife. During delivery your wife can be extremely irrational. Try to ignore this. She may say things that she does not mean because of the pain.
  • If you want to touch or hold her, ask her first. During the delivery she is very sensitive. Stroking or a small pat can take her by surprise and irritate her.
  • Try not to break her concentration during the active phase. Don’t make a telephone call for instance or talk loudly in the neighbourhood of your wife during the delivery.